Recently, it's fun.

Greetingz people! How have all of you been? My guess is this post will be filled with photos :D excited? Well let's say i did my shopping again, this time not online and... darn, there's this guy that gets on my nerves so much i actually like him! So... let's get to my awesome travel to Genting Highlands, with the Classy environment and cooling atmosphere IT IS PURE BLISS.

We sat the cable car up the hill, YES instead of the long and tiring car ride. AWESHUMME YEAH?

Camwhore mode on because i look oh so pretty in my new hairstyle <3

On the cable car i send my kisses to everyoneeeeee

There's this stupid patch on my faceeee ): but i still look fantabulous. *flips hair*

My outfit of the day? Ombre pullover. I know it looks super good.

Then i started thinking like what if... what if the string holding the cable car suddenly snaps...

and i fall fall fall down down down to these greeeeeeeen....

HECKCARE. CAMWHORE more... beautiful me is ugly

before i alight... goodbye kiss <3

You all must be wondering what is she doing, she told us she likes this guy, then now she jumps to cable cars… Okay okay. back to that guy abit. the story starts this way, i was sooooooooo bored at home... YESYES, it's the lame start of story...

One day, Cynthia was bored at home and she had a mischievous idea.

so i took my brother's phone and scrolled through the people he talked to recently, chose a few and sent things like "hi", "hello" and "how are you?" okay i know that's lame, so the response was kinda lame too... it goes "huh?", "who is this? daniel?(my brother's name)" or "what the fuck?". And i found it amusing just for that little while... Then i thought it was boring. So my  messages to the next one (oh and i chose guys only), was "hi fuckface". Some background information i got from my brother about him before i insulted him was: he's from Catholic Highschool (quite a good GUYS school), he's English standard is high and he is HORNY. CAN YOU ALMOST SEE MY WINK? okay so i thought, wow, this guy should be fun. And most certainly... He IS fun. how? i cannot really say the whole long conversation and our way of getting to know each other but basically, HE THREW ME DISGRACING INSULTS LIKE: i'm ugly, my english is crap... AND MUCH MORE I CAN'T EVEN. So i tried to use my argumentative skills, and great English. SO, I THOUGHT i had the gift of the gab but meeting him man, HE WAS DIFFICULT. okay calm your tits Cynthia, you did not bad!! ya so that's about how we started talking. Then... he told me he wasn't angry at all with me. LIKE HEY, i was insulting you but i'm not angry at you. And then best thing? he asked me out. So i went and HE SAID I WAS UGLY REMEMBER? then he said i was pretty. or more like: " i thought you were really pretty" But boy, this guy has a huge ego, and really proud ass he is. 

but point is, i actually like him, even as he insults me. OKay, you all know i'm insane ya? so i will continue later about this because... i love to leave people hanging (;

That was when me and her, Yinn, she's my cousin, first entered our hotel room. How crazy we were. I kinda like her alot, like really, i tell her everything. A friend and a kin, what more? like a sister to me she is. lovely personality, pure and kind hearted, but not toooooo goody girl type. sometimes, i need true friends too. 

Can I continue the story further another time guys? I needa run. At Malaysia so busy at the moment. Sorry! Love ya all.

**" i do things, because i can"

17 june 2013

Malaysia

The jewel, at the bottom of my heart.

Well hello guys. Let's see... ain't you all who knows me well expecting my upload on this very day? yep, it's the day. 11th June, yes, W.Y's birthday. hmm... so now there's the anticipation, wait what? she hates him now or... did what everybody fear come true? she's back to the miserable self? oh yes, i'm ranting. bear with me peeps. Many could happen in a few days. Firstly, i got many unanswered questions answered. Yes, during the relationship i had so many questions so many doubts, then all of a sudden, unexpectedly, they all got answered. What, when, how? yupyup, relax people, i will get a little into the story soon... but well, i'm not gonna go back to the weakling who cried her eyes out everyday... but nope, i can't hate him anymore. Wanna know why? because he cared, far more than i thought possible, for me and i, let him down so much such that, i am really ashamed to even deem myself fit as his girlfriend.

I spoke to his close friend a few days ago, and she told me everything. And how shock i was, to know that i knew nothing, about the guy i claimed to have loved so dearly. because he, never did open up to me. W.Y never wanted our relationship to be open, i used to wonder why. i thought of reasons which seemed reasonable then, but ridiculous now. i thought he was ashamed to have me as his girlfriend, or maybe he had someone he like that he didn't wanna let her know he's attached to me... all these reaons which ached my heart so much those times... then i realized how awfully wrong i was. the reason, the real reason at the bottom of his heart is because :HE WAS TOO AFRAID TO LOSE ME, HE BELIEVED THAT OPEN RELATIONSHIP DON'T LAST LONG, AND BECAUSE ALL THE TRENDS HAVE SHOWN THE OPEN RELATIONSHIPS DON'T LAST, HE TRIED SO HARD TO PROTECT OUR RELATIONSHIP. Why, W.Y why, why didn't you ever tell me? what your heart was thinking, how much i could give to just find that out... but now... everything's too late.
Not only so, i found out that every time he quarreled with me, he would be really moody in class and it would be really obvious to everyone. So, i affected him that much? what i would've given to know. not only so, his class had some issues with his close friend, and hence, has issues with him and his entire clique once. and guess what? because his class knew of our relationship, they criticized me too. the best thing was, W.Y kept mum all the while when his class discriminated him, but when his class pulled me into the matter too, he actually turned against them for me. My protective boyfriend.... and he told me he actually fought with his classmates because of me, i did not believe then... and so it turns out to be true. What did i do? i ruin my relationship... i ruined it all...

Yes that's me and him. how happy we were. (i couldn't expose him, because i don't think he'll want me to) Yep and that's the dock/seaside/beach i mentioned before. I'm not grieving or anything again, i'm sad definitely. Sad that it was meant this way, sad that we didn't understand each other better... though i admit, it was more of me not making enough effort to think through my actions. so right here... 

So this is me, 

swallowing my pride,

standing in front of you,

saying "i'm sorry for that night"

and i'll go back to December all the time

Turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you,

wishing i'd realized,

what i had when you were mine,

and i'll go back to December and make it all right...

( for me it's September though... 14th September)

So well ya, happy birthday dear, probably something you'd not hear me call you again. i won't wish you yes i won't, because i won't remind you of the relationship you tried so hard to maintain, but fall apart. i won't spoil this day for you no.

These days, i haven't been sleeping,

staying up playing back myself leaving,

when your birthday passed, and i didn't call.

then i think about summer all the beautiful times,

i watched you laughing from the passengers side,

and i realized i loved you in the fall...

and then the cold came,

the dark days when fear crept into my mind,

you gave me all your love, and all i gave you was goodbye...

So, on a lighter note, i'm done venting all my frustrations, and yes i cried. but i'm happy alright, to know after all, he cared so much, so very much. Let's talk about life recently with the aid of manymany photos because i'm not talkative anymore for today.

I went crazy under the rain, and baby, i love the rainnnnnnnnn.

Okay wondering who's that? that's my brother's girlfriend, whom i've spent like what? 3 days with her and am thoroughly in love with her haha :P okay she's looking at me post this so kinda am lost for words. But alright to be honest, we spoke about anything and everything, and by everything, i mean literally everything under the sun (: i'm looking forward to so many more days ahead with her but sadly, tonight i'm leaving for Malaysia  but the woman can't come. Boohooo ): ( SHE STILL HAS THE CHEEK TO LAUGH BESIDE ME)okay nevermind, but i'll call her CT<3

okay so i have the sudden discovered affection for cats. KITTY CAT. YESYESYES i love them, even my clothes have them. yep^^ i even set up a home and bought food (okay, i didn't pay for the food, lovely boly did). so i actually fed them, like many many of them, but the most to the milky brown kitty above? (till now i have no idea whether is it a male or a female) ITS NAME IS MILKSHAKE. oh and it loves me and i love it yayy <3 i know that's very little description but oh well...

But if we loved again,

i swear i'd loved you right...

i'd go back in time and change it,

but i can't...

*quotes from Taylor swift, Back to December

11 June 2013

Singapore

I'm a selfish woman yes, i'm proud to be.

WELL HELLO. My dad's out so i'm here as promised. It will be a long upload but relax, there'll be pictures and stuffs to keep you entertained. sososo, hmm, what should i start with? Perhaps maybe... OH YES... THIS

Yep XD that's the trophy. My first ever debate and i actually won. Thereby, victory tasted great but... well to be honest, i found the opposing team weren't all that strong so it was easy for my team and -coughs-, my performance really weren't all that up to standard HOWEVER, you all shall not laugh at me okay?!  (: because, helloooo, besides this being my first ever debate, i received no training or anything! so if i could actually speak confidently and argue even, i am already doing great. RIGHT? right. Shush okay people, we don't want everyone to know that i was actually quite nervous. LALALALALA. HEHE :P but anyway guys, great news! i was asked for a second debate, this time in both English and Chinese language. YAY, but stress level is really high too. Apparently my school forked up 1000 dollars just to send professionals to train us for 4 lessons. Seriously, i feel like i HAVE to win. but the schools we are up against ain't no easy targets anymore. It's only my second debate dearies ): i'm really quite worried that my nerves will get the better of me and screw everything up )': whattt should i doooooo? but it's too late to back out anyway, since i already gave my consent to participate. AHWELL! i should just do my best and hopefully, do well. After all  nerves aside, people who knew me know that arguing IS my forte. Well speaking of which...

When the boss comes into the picture to practice her debating skills. (i know i rock thank you)

And so, the heated debate is there. This is on Instagram where a shop owner meets a customer who fails to read the owner's terms and conditions about "no trade and no nego", and continues to bug the owner for negotiation after many rejections and on the last few messages of texts, she actually replied in a demanding tone, not only so, she actually replied very rudely ( saying: "forget it, i'm not interested anymore" ). so, the owner which is @newxdisaster here, got really pissed and posted a picture of her and the incident with a few insulting comments, but i totally side with her. and in this case, two girls, i have to mention with poor English and really hilariously failed reasoning came into the picture to actually scold me, well hey, it's me you're talking about there, just in case you didn't know, nobody messes with me. what's more, you really should be working on your language skills rather than talking to me. Besides throwing insults, @nodinme and @dearharu has no other way of arguing their point, despite, they still cease to feel ashamed and continue to speak as if their set of arguments were really impressive. These people are seriously let downs of the society. It really pissed me off at first, but after that i found them seriously things to be laughed at. whats more, lemme show you something.

YES,i can only laugh. That's the useless fool who has been arguing with me all along- @dearharu, and the one with the hair all over her face, that's the rude customer who hasn't appeared once, probably to much of a coward. How ugly can a person be? that's seriously one of a kind, those things up there ain't even to be looked at. TURNS OUT? those two are friends. then @nodinme is a newly created account, probably another friend of the customer who was another coward or the customer herself. Whatever is it, we all see who's the loser here, bunch of cowardly dogs which aren't of any use both inside and outside. Basically, rotten all over. I'm not sorry to insult them. If you didn't have the ability to, don't come on here and place your arguments that were seriously a failure. Instead of making a fruitless attempt to spice things up in your boring life (we all can see why is her life boring, because she's too ugly), why not try and maybe earn some money to invest on both your knowledge (sadly, intelligence is something fixed and she'll have to remain stupid) and your face. Perhaps a plastic surgeon in Korea? Or else, shouldn't you be hiding at home and not show your face around to embarrass your family members for having such a hideous child?

as you all can see, i'm no kind woman. step on my toe and i sure as hell will make your life a living hell. BUT, she's ugly and it IS A FACT.

Even smiling the ugliest i can, i looked like probably a million times better than that thing.
not that i'm being proud.

There. I just proved my point. and let me clarify some things. yes, the customer might have been really poor, but she was rude, that was exactly why i scolded her so much. After all  i myself ain't really that well off, why would i look down on the poor? I myself have tried to negotiate on the prices, but after clarification and rejection ONCE, i would have stopped and even apologize if i changed my mind about buying the items. If i didn't have enough money, I save or i don' buy. simple as that. so if i'm able to save and eat lesser just to purchase some things, why does that fucker (pardon my poor use of strong words) there things by being shameless and asking ceaselessly for negotiation would get her what she wants. FAT HOPE YEA. so she doesn't have the right to be rude. point made, i shall move on to another subject.

so since i'm in high spirits today, i decided to model on a dress which is of a style i hardly wear.

Yep and i was so happy i looked like i was floating. I know i have a great figure and i am awesome thank you. (shameless me is really shameless but well, i'm proud of myself and so to say, i have a reason to be) I may not be really skinny guys, but although i always say i am, i know i'm not fat. I am definitely flawed, but that's what makes me proud because definitely, i have many more things to be proud of than many others in this world. Soooo... Yep, i've begun to think of myself and really analyse what i have and what i don't. I no longer am like the me i was before who only think of others or more likely... W.Y. I am selfish now yes but in this world where the competition is what determines your path in life, i have to be and i could, should and would be. We all have to fight for what we want. This is reality people, reality is war and war is bloodshed. If it's not your opponents death, it is yours. so i hope i act as warning to you guys, to remind all of you darlings that you never know what a smile holds. well, more than often, mine holds a thousand daggers.

BUT, i have the capability to be nice too. i just learnt that rarity is better cherished so i'm only nice to certain people.

** courage of women is often mistaken as insanity**

1 June 2013

Singapore