I was mistaken, it was just me.

Really, today was actually a perfect day until something ruin everything. until my heart was crushed and trampled on again. Until i cried, YET again. well, i had lessons at school even though it was a march school holiday here today. nonetheless, i was orinally very cheerful and in high spirits.

My lessons with my pretty chemistry teacher. My great mood then...

Boly eating lunch and her weird way of separating the bread and the meat of the burger before eating, i would be smiling if not for the crushed heart.

Boly's competition where she was to be a helper there...

competition held at our school's hall.

I actually was feeling very good and very happy after a workout, i was extremely tired and happily went to bathe. After that i was still so happy and waited for E.C to reach home.

My healthy meal that i had enjoyed eating until now where i feel like throwing up.

Wondering why am i like a crazy girl ranting and being so negative about everything AGAIN. let me tell you why, then you can laugh at me. And laugh at how stupid i was, and how naive i am, and how absolutely a failure i am. I said the girl, YY, was a failure and a trash, i realize im more of one.

How about taking a look at our cute couple?

So fucking adorable, always online together. and offline too.

Another very interesting set of photos

And YY told me she wasnt talking to him, probably extremely kind hearted her is afraid that pathetic me would be upset that awesome her manage to get the attention of my ex (W.Y)

Boly say it is just pure coincindence. stupid me actually wanted to believe. Let's see how coincidental can things get.

Thats today when the YY who says she doesnt speak to W.Y anymore. How coincidental. They HAD to be online and offline at the same time. Let's say today's just a day of coincidence. Well then let's see more of today's coincidences.

So? too destined to be together they had to be online AND offline at exactly the same time? probably i should tell them they were meant together since they were so in pile which each others lives. Right? i should right?

So? W.Y could just move on and forget all the times we had? the times which i THOUGHT was precious to us? BOTH of us? but now i know it's just trash to him. I thought somehow he wasnt speaking the truth about losing feelings for me when we broke, But ofcourse it was true, i was his entertainment no more. What could be better than an opportunity to dump me? Then Y.Y, i said she was a joker. Well i was, i was the one who stupidly believed the "you are my everything and i love you and we will last forever". I was the one. so who was the garbage here? me. Y.Y? why couldnt you just tell me you two were talking? so that i could still believe there's nothing between you two?! ya right, the pathetic one who havent let go of her ex has to be kept in the dark because she musnt be hurt anymore, or later she will go insane. RIGHT?! im the one crazy enough to love you, W.Y, then crazy enough to hurt myself and let you go because i wanted you to be happy. THEN, shameless enough to BEG you back, to ask you to give ME another CHANCE, then crazy enough to still love you, after you told me things like: "i'm fucking happy without you" WHO was the one who said he couldnt imagine life without me? Ofcourse, I was the idiot believing it. I was the bitch stupid enough to hope that maybe we could last forever despite already knowing all your lies?! I was the one who remembered every moment, every smile, every sulk you had. I was the one who willingly hide all my unhappiness so that you'll be happy. I was the idiot, the stupid person, the trash, the cheap bitch. I WAS ALL ALONG THE JOKER. i dont have the right to even say Y.Y is a failure a bitch, because i was the one here.

How foolish i was, i thought i'll get over him and i'll be generous and wish him luck and happiness with whoever he likes now. Then look what happen to me, hiding behind this screen, crying and broken HAHA, foolish arent i? who have i to blame but myself? I saw a simple relationship too importantly, when he just treated it as a game. Ya... I should really go reflect upon my intelligence. I'm probably the most idiotic person. SHAMELESS and STUPID.

** i would stop being careful when handling other's heart, because nobody cared when they trample and stabbed all over mine.**

**I'm giving up not because i've moved on, because i have nothing left for you to use, nothing left for you to play with**

**i can never forgive you because i loved you, when you didnt even care**

18 March 2013

Singapore